Lots of things happened in my life lately...
1. I've decided to NOT retake my AS economics paper. Life is all about making the right decision and taking proper risks. Hope my decision is right this time and hopefully i will score better grades for my A2 economics. Thank God there's still A2 for me... my second and only chance to score well this time. I must.
2. Having trial exams now. Yup, it's not important as we won't be using our trial exams results to apply for Uni. However, we still have to face it although we're not fully-prepared or even unprepared at all. Life's like this. You just have to face it. Law papers on Friday.... wish me luck!!
3. It's our beloved country's national day today - 31st of August !
Selamat Merdeka, Malaysia!My merdeka wish is to see that M'sia can become a first-world country someday....with first-world facilities and first-world mindsets. I know it seems kinda impossible... but still...it's my wish. I have the right to wish, right? =P Thank God M'sians are quite friendly ppl.....phew.
4. No roommate yet. It's a good and bad thing for me. Good thing is that i can concentrate studying alone in my room without anyone disturbing me or distracting me. Bad thing is that nobody can
kacau me and disturb me in my room. I need some distractions sometimes. Good distractions that is. Hmm... Oh yah, i need someone to talk to in my room... when i'm bored with my books that is. I guess that is why i've being talking and laughing to myself like nobody's business lately? Yup, i sound crazy i know. But this is the only way to keep my sanity. What to do? I dunno... just give me a good roommate plz?
Ok... time for me to mug hard hard for my law paper 3 and 4. I LOVE READING LAW!!!!!!!
*gasp*
Gotta really thank my lucky stars coz i managed to get the original room key from the Accommodation Office this afternoon. And yup guys, i'm back in Inti. It's still the same. sucks. haha.
Just woke up. From a nap. Wasted too much energy cleaning my room and unpacking my stuff already. Gotta bathe now. But i'm still sleepy lar. Shit.
Can't blog much now. Mental block. Can't think of anything. Brrrrrrrr.....
Don't really know what to blog rite now. I just know that i'm going back to Inti tomorrow. Argh. Time flies.... all i can say is that time flies TOO FAST... agree?
Gonna have a late dinner tonight coz gotta wait for my sis to come back from s'pore. Mummy prepared her famous and delicious hainanese chicken rice. Dad even invited Gugu to join us for dinner. Oh yah, my grandma just came back from kl this afternoon. Gugu bought a Secret Recipe Classic Cheese cake for us coz she said she wanted to treat us to something. So we requested a cheese cake from secret recipe!
*drools*Seems like tonight's we're gonna celebrate some big occasion or something, judging by the cake and my mum's well-known hainanese chicken rice. My dad jokingly told us that tonight we're gonna pre-celebrate Malaysia's National Day. "Ya rite, dad" This isn't funny at all, is it? And guess what my bro told me... he said tonight we're celebrating the departure of LIM YINA. Yup, that's ME. I'm going back tomorrow u see, that's why. He seems so happy that i'm going back...hahaha. That idiot. =P
Trials starting on Monday. And there's still a lot for me to study. Boohoo. don't think i can finish studying EVERYTHING for trials. it's just TOO MUCH. of coz, i won't forget to study the important stuff, don't worry.
I still have that feeling that everything is moving soooooo fast around me. Why is that so? Am i slacking too much? or maybe daydreaming too much? Seems like my A-levels will be coming to an end very very soon... what's next for me? I really dunno... sigh. This is another BIG crossroad, or should i say hurdle for me. I know i shouldn't worry about this... i should focus more on my exams... but whenever i think about my future, i'm scared. Well, guess it's best to leave it in the hands of God i think... =)
Guess i better bathe now...dinner's ready already. In the oven. Just waiting for dad and sis to come back home. Till then, will blog again when i reach my hostel tomorrow PROVIDED the accommodation office is open! gotta pray real hard that it'll be open tomorrow if not i really have to sleep on the road. Ouch. I lost my freaking damn keys...that's why!! ~ ~
*feeling like a goldfish, trying to blow bubbles*
I dunno why i've been going out TOO frequently nowadays. What a busy woman i am. I should be mugging like hell at home instead. But I'm not. Anyways, this week is my last week before my trials. gotta make good and full use of the remaining time here. My books, are still my best companions.
Watched 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory' last Saturday. A chocolatey movie indeed. Delicioussss. =) Those who love this story written by Roald Dahl should watch this movie. I'm one of those who read the story over and over again when i was young. Aww. Miss those days when i can just do nothing at home but to read my favourite storybooks over and over again for god-knows-how-many times.
I have carsick. Motion sickness to be exact. Can easily faint after a long bus ride from JB to KL. I'm such a weakling. Sigh. Anyways, luckily 33 was beside me that time...and she quickly asked a malay guy to offer his seat to me during the bus ride from puduraya to IOI mall in Puchong. She panicked. We laughed our heads off when we recalled what happened in the bus that time. lol. Sorry to scare you leh, 33. hehe.
Went to KLIA to send kayyin off to the States on monday morning. Her flight was 3.15pm so we spent our last few hours with her. Took pics of coz. Her family was there...together with a few relatives. Don, liqing, 33 and me went to send her off that morning. Before she went into the departure gate, we exchanged hugs. Suddenly, i noticed my eyes were filled with tears, waiting eagerly to drop. Then, i looked at Don, he was the first one to let his tears flow freely from his eyes. I couldn't bear it anymore and i just let it all out. 33 was the next one to cry. It's kinda amusing coz her family din cry as much as we did. However, no matter how strong a person is, human beings are still vulnerable. Kay Yin, too....was touched by our gestures, being the strongest woman among our 'sister gang', she too, cried a bit before she went in. It was the first time seeing her crying. Of coz, i cried more after i saw her crying. Crying is just infectious...it spreads from one individual to the other...
Take care, Kay Yin...
You will be deeply missed by everyone here in JB...
All da best in US...
Good Luck! Jia You!
Will call you soon!!
Miss ya lots!!
you'll be touched if u read this, kayyin.... hehe. Wait for my call !! Muacks!
Went out again today. It was FUN. =D Went back to school to collect my original copy of the SPM certificate. Met Ms Mary, Pn Chia and Cik. Ruhana. Siew wern din go back to sch with me coz she's not free....so in the end, i called huah shin (last nite!) to teman me back to sch! yeah...i knew she would agree to teman me back...hehe.
Met our senior, koon yang in school this morning. btw, i drove to school today. =D Me, huah shin and koon yang were talking and talking coz koon yang was waiting for his sis while huah shin and me were waiting for khai san. That was about 11.30am. This trip back to school made me realized that i really really really miss my life back in SSI. The sweetness and bitterness of studying in SSI. It's true. Really wish i was studying in Form One till Form Five once again.....ahhhhh....if only i could turn back the time...
*starting to daydream again*Met up with hui ling and wei ling as well. They're still the same....=) Met William...he's still very fair...hehe. He was rushing for time...so yeah....no chance to chat with him, too bad. Met up with Sian Wei too...he was rushing too. Every form six student seemed to be rushing for time...they and their tuition. -_- Those who met me today was kinda shocked (or happy? =P) to see me again. lol. i wonder why. =P yalar, i know i've been disappearing from planet earth for a looooooooong time already...that's why i'm there today. haha. =P
Then i drove to mee hoon kueh shop from our school. Great achievement i must say coz that time was the peak lunch hour.
*Bravo, yina!* Huah shin sat in my car while hui ling and wei ling sat in khai san's car. Really envy those who can drive to school EVERYDAY man.... ahhh. What a privilege! Hui ling and wei ling din join us for mee hoon kueh lunch coz they had already made an appointment with koon yang, so yah, too bad... Instead, me, huah shin, khai san went to eat our mee hoon kueh... Jia Chiun and Wei Ning (yup, they're a couple, hehe) joined us too! Jia Chiun is still the same old jia chiun...always a joker. lol. Conclusion : 4 girls having lunch with a guy. =P Result : Talking crap plus tons of wuliao-ness spreading round the table. lol. I really miss them.
*Aww*After lunch, khai san went to her maths tuition at henry tan's shop. Henry Tan is still the same. haha. forever the same. =P Jia chiun and wei ning went to pak tuo at plaza pelangi while huah shin and me oso went 'pak-tuoing' there...ahha. Met up with them again at Popular. Again, 4 of us crapped like nobody's business there. Yuan Xiang noticed me in Popular first coz i saw a missed call from him while i was loitering there. He told me he's at the Malay novels area...so i went and find him lor. He's so tall already!!! ohmegosh! Huah shin thought he's my 2nd bf. lol. =P I wonder why that gal will think that way...haha...
After saying goodbye to jia chiun and wei ning (we din wanna kacau them u see), we lepak-ed around plaza pelangi...went to metrojaya. Then we proceeded to buy Coco drinks (bubble tea). Huah shin treated me this time coz the last time i treated her (according to her), haha. Thanks gal! Then i suggested that we sit at McD while sipping our bubble tea. So we sat there lor..without ordering anything from McD. Sorry Ronald Mcdonald's! =P I din do it on purpose! =P Luckily nobody chase us out man...phew!
Oh no...it's gonna be 5.30pm soon....
Yina's Happy Hour is approaching!!! I gotta stop here....how sad.... hehe. Tata!
P.S. I love Fridaysssssss!!!! TGIF! =)
having a great time at new york hotel and redbox. =)
All of us with kayyin. =D
It has been a long time since i last blogged.... suddenly this blogging habit seems to be alien to me. Anyways. I've been wasting my time here in the cyber world for the past 1 hour or so. Surfing friendster, chatting on MSN messenger, and suddenly i have the urge to well.... BLOG!
*taps fingers randomly on the table*Last weekend was a busy week for me. Went out with my good old bunch of friends. Love them to bits. We're all still the same although some of our hairstyles are not the same anymore. Kay yin became prettier ( really!) and more feminine ( hehe! ). She dyed her hair into some really nice brownish colour that suits her and she went for this ceramic perm! Pretty woman...walking down the street....pretty woman she is!
*winks*Gonna summarize what we did last saturday during our outing. Kay yin was of coz...the star of the day...since it was HER farewell thingy. hehe. First of all, we went to redbox, pelangi plaza and sang our hearts out from 12 noon till 3pm. ( Happy hours) It was great to be hanging out with my wacko friends. Heh. We sang all sorts of songs ( chinese, english, and even malay). And we were so crazy to the extent that some of us sang one of those traditional CNY songs. believe it or not! Crazy people indeed.... lol.
*smiling to herself*The food at redbox sucks...horrible. I din even manage to finish my 'nasi goreng kampung'. It's worse than my mum's version of fried rice. (oops) Anyway, we have to at least finish half of our food coz that's our lunch. So yeah, too bad for us. They really gotta improve on their menu...at least change their dishes or enhance their cooking skills or something.
After redbox, we went to ych's house. He has a very beautiful golden retriever named Carlos. Beautiful dog. Beautiful fur.
*aww!* We were at his house from 3 something till 6.30pm discussing where to have our dinner. lol. We did watch a bit of tv... and kayyin was busy talking to his mother. So well... the guys were playing PS2, i can't really play with Carlos coz the 3 girls were afraid of him. Boohoo. too bad. But i did manage to touch him.hehe. And at last, we decided to go to New York Hotel for kay yin's farewell dinner coz the majority of us wanted to eat buffet dinner so badly. Hehe.
*drools*The buffet dinner at New York Hotel was not bad. They were serving chinese food that nite. So they have steamboat as well. The prawns were huge, huge, huge! i love prawns! I'm a famous prawn eater! muahaha! I finished more than 1kg of bbq prawns at Seoul Garden before! Believe it or not! hehe. Oh yah, there's ice-kacang at the buffet too. Somehow, for no reason, everyone seemed to be fascinated over the ice-kacang maker.Yup, we're suaku ppl. You will notice a smile on the person's face after he/she has succesfully made his/her very own ice-kacang. A sense of achievement perhaps? =) Or maybe crazy ppl smile for no reason? =P
*smiling again*Met up with Yilie and Zhi Yao. Both came back from France for their summer break. They're still the same. I asked yilie to translate chinese sentences into french language to me. hehe. Just curious. =P So cool....to be able to learn one more language. And she brought a few of her photo albums for us to admire. We were so jealous of her man.... can go travel around France... took pics of the Eiffel Tower, the leaning tower of pisa as the background. Couldn't continue looking at the pics anymore coz we were too jealous! haha. wonder when can i go visit France.... hmm.....
*dreaming of a vacation in Paris*During dinner, we took lotsa photos. Here and there. Everywhere. haha. the waiters and waitresses must be thinking that we're a bunch of nutcases. =P The photos turned out to be great. Will wanna develop some of the photos soon. Hehe. After dinner, we went to 33's house for a sleepover. Just me, 33, siew wern and kayyin. The 4 crazy gals. lol. Kayyin fetched me home so that i can pick up my thumbdrive, toothbrush and my pyjamas while 33 fetched siew wern home. Kayyin came down and greeted my parents since she won't be able to meet them for a year. My parents bid farewell to her...asked her to take care those kinda words... quite an emotional meeting. Haha. After that, she drove back home with me in the car. 33 reached her house not long after that. When everyone's ready, we hopped into 33's car and she drove the 3 of us to her house at skudai. =) Mind you, that was 10 minutes before 12 midnight!
We were talking crazy during the nite, as usual. Lying together on the beds while talking to one another in the dark. Damn dark in 33's room, no light at all! Dunno what time we fell asleep...must be very late. The next morning, we woke up at 8.30am. As usual, i was the last one to wake up. haha. kayyin gotta use a rotan to 'cane' on my backside to wake me up. Went for our dim sum breakfast.... was yummy and delicious! hehe. 33 took us to this famous dim sum shop at skudai...a lot of ppl. gotta wait for our table... it was 9am that time. =) Kayyin, being the star, treated us for dim sum that morning.
*thanks gal!! muacks!* it's such a blessing to be able to indulge in dim sum while sipping chinese tea with my 3 darlings.
*you gals are simply great**wishing to hang out with u gals again*ok, it's late. past 12 midnight already. 12.04am. been blogging for the past 45 minutes... time flies. My baby is online now.... =) guess it's time to divert my attention to him now.... rite baby? hehe. i will try to sleep early, dun worry.... haha.
Somebody, anybody...buy me that
Haagen-Dazs speciality mooncakes! Saw it from the newspaper advert. It looked very very yummilicious. And yup..i would definitely want that chocolate flavour. =P
I SO WANNA EAT THAT
MEE HOON KUEH AT PELANGI!!
I SO WANNA TRY OUT THAT
JAPANESE LUNCH PROMOTION OUT THERE! (jln serampang)
Had fried mee siam for lunch just now. Bought from giant coz mummy din have the time to prepare lunch. I accompanied her to Giant you see... There's soooo many senior citizens and small kids when you go to Giant on a weekday morning. I feel like i'm one of them....
Just sent my bro for his physics tuition. Boy...the weather's so freaking great outside rite now! But i'm just too lazy to exercise my bones.....i do wanna swim but..but..but...i'm lazy to drive out again...
oh yah, i'm addicted to this Channel 8's chinese drama called 'Love Me, Love Me Not' starring Jacelyn Tay, Wong Li Lin, Chen Han Wei and Xie Shau Guang. It's at 5.30pm EVERYDAY.
*beams* Although i've watched this drama before... i'm still watching it again coz it's somehow my so-called "happy hour" everyday. 5.30pm to 6.30pm!
*grins*I'm hungry.....berry berry hungry.... ahhh...suddenly i remember that there's
'ham chin peng' in the kitchen...mummy bought them from Giant just now.....
*screaming with joy*A hungry man is an angry man. Better not continue blogging now... it's best that i offer a 'ham chin peng' to myself and indulge in it while reading something. Hee. =P And the time is kinda close to
Yina's Happy Hour. Might as well warm up the TV first...... hehehe.
*TGIF - Thank God It's Friday* (drools)For those of you who doesn't know what on earth is 'ham chin peng', it is something like the 'you tiao' in mandarin or 'you cha kuih' in dunno-what dialect. There's either sweet or salty filling inside a 'ham chin peng'... the correct pronunciation is 'harm cin peng'. It is round in shape...and most importantly, it's worth eating! Got it? Good.
*grabs a 'ham chin peng' and switch on the tv*
The haze in kl has reached the 'hazardous' level. Thank God i'm in JB rite now...at least i can escape from the haze for a while... Wonder whether should i get a mask when i get back to Nilai...hmm.
Went to Holiday Plaza for a haircut last nite. Got a new hairstyle now. Having a haircut everytime makes me feel like there are less worries for me..u know...the 'cut your hair so your worries will be gone' thingy?
*raises her eyebrows*Anyways. Me talking to Jane Sze, my senior in St John. She's encourgaging me to go to KDU college to attend the Law Careers Convention 2005 where all the top law firms in M'sia will be there. Current/graduated/going-to-be law students can shoot them with any questions. It is a rare opportunity though...but it's in KL...and i'm in JB....how to go?!?! She said this Convention is useful in the sense that i'll get to know about the current legal market and their qualifications and requirements. Hmm.... maybe it's the best time for me to find out whether is LAW really suitable for me?
*putting on her thinking cap*Dad will be back very soon...he's gonna bring us out for lunch (mummy and me). I wanna try out the new jap restaurant along jln serampang...they're having this lunch promotion...RM6.99 only inclusive of pickles, soup, main course, and a drink. i'll see what my parents would like to eat first only i'll suggest this to them...hehe.
time for me to go off... gonna mug my ass off this afternoon. Will only come online later at nite to chill out... btw, today's a public holiday for the Johor state. I knew about this when i saw my bro idling around in the house this morning when i woke up at 9.30am. Hmm... he's having his tuition rite now...good...coz i need some peace.
*hops off her chair*
Angeline trying out my nerdy specs. >.<
Niak doing his thing. That's Mr.Callistus, our socio lecturer.
Me beautiful Reef slippers
Everything seems to be so gloomy around me...or maybe it's just me....=(
*trying to fight her tears back*Trying very hard NOT to feel so down and upset over my not-satisfied results.... guess this entry will be the opposite of my previous entry. I sounded so cheerful and happy when i wrote my last blog...and look at this...just look at me rite now..... feeling totally the opposite.
*sniff sniff*Cried a lot yesterday. My eyes have this tight feeling rite now... appear to be kinda small... can't really open them... I will just cry and cry and cry whenever something bad happened to me... i know it's useless but it's the only way to let it go.... i feel like i'm such a loser after knowing my results. DAMN. I studied hard but still i got such crappy results... i know my expectations are kinda high... but hey... 'if you can't reach the moon, at least you'll fall among the stars', right?
Last nite, my dad told me not to cry and feel so sad anymore. The fact is the fact. I can't change the fact about my results. I know everyone at home is disappointed with me. I can sense it. Who will be happy when their daughter cannot reach their expectations? It's like...i'm falling down from the sky above....right down to the muddy ground. It hurts. A lot. It hurts when i've let my parents and myself down. I know such setbacks and failures in life are inevitable but still...i did all i could to prevent this from happening to me and yet....i failed.
*tears filling her eyes*Just went out for a drink with my baby just now. Was glad to see him once again. But still, my mind can't stop thinking about my results. I can't just forget about everything so fast. It takes time. Anyways. Thanks for those hugs, baby... u made me feel kinda better, really.
*hugs*Kinda demotivated by my results...that's why i'm not into the mood to study. I just can't stop brooding over it. I know i have to get out of this situation asap...i'm trying...i'm trying.I can't go on like this... i gotta start some serious mugging. I have to. I still got my A2...and my trials is like 3 more weeks from now...T_T
However, i'm still damn disappointed with my results. Especially for sociology. Never got a C for sociology before...(tests and semester exams) Sigh sigh sigh... what happened? In fact, i've found out that nobody got an A or B for sociology this time. The highest grade was only a C. What's wrong with cambridge? Cambridge A-levels (arts) exams are shithard. No turning point for me already...i gotta bear with it....2 more months.............sigh.
My mum and sis are very right indeed. They said i'm a person that couldn't face reality bravely enough. I admit that i'm that kinda person too.
*sighs* Have the tendency to sleep whenever i could nowadays just becoz i'm hoping that i will forget about my results once i wake up... but i'm wrong... the first thing i wake up after my sleep is that i'll think about it again. It just keeps on spinning round and round my head. And also, i'm hoping that i can just sleep and sleep and sleep (forever) and not to wake up to reality ever again. But i can't! T_T
*grumbles*Life must go on... will cheer up asap i hope. I know..it's all up to me. I need to be strong. I have to be strong. I MUST be strong enough to face other uncertainties in life later. There's still a long long long road ahead for me. I can't give up this easily. And of coz i would never give up. Hopefully this will motivate me to strive harder for my A2 exams. At least it will help to make up for my AS grades. Yup, there's still hope for me...thank god it's not the end of the world yet.
=(
It's the start of my
HOLIDAYS!!!
wait a minute....it should be more like a
STUDY BREAK for me instead....-_-
Anyways. Had a great day yesterday and today. =D
Went to KL yesterday with parents and sis. Went to Ikano, Ikea and The Curve. Wonderful. =)
Today...went to s'pore with dad and sis. Main aim was to help my sis to carry her stuff to her hostel room. She's starting uni tomorrow u see. Then went swimming at NUS with shen jean...chatted while swimming in the pool. GREAT WEATHER! I LOVE THE SUN!! =D The swim was a great one... i love swimming!! wooo hooo!
*smiles like nobody's business*Did an illegal thing at NUS today. Had dinner secretly ( actually it was openly) at Eusoff Hall!! Yeeheehee. =P Shen jean brought me there!! She's such a dahling... you go girl!! =) i memorized her roommate's matric number and her name and also her room number! haha. So hilarious man. Laughed like nobody's business when we were scooping our rice... i was kinda nervous that the canteen people will find out that i'm actually an intruder there... muahaha. But still, i kept my coolness and try not to giggle so much. Heeheehee! Great fun i had today! =)
*smiles again*Came back. Had dinner with my family at home. Had dinner twice today! hehe. I was so exhausted after the swim. Which explains why i'm so tired rite now...but hell no...i'm not sleepy yet! I'm still very excited bout the fact that i've figured out how to use my sis's iPod Shuffle...hahaha.
*praising herself over and over again**nearly fell off the chair due to her own laughing*Now, i'm gonna transfer all the songs that I WANT to my sis's iPod Shuffle and gonna listen while i lie down on my comfy bed later! yipppppeeeee!! She's not bringing to s'pore tomorrow coz she'll be coming back again tomorrow. So yup. It's MINE for the time being. hehehehe. She's loaning it to me for two days...until tuesday..so i gotta make GOOD use of this golden opportunity...rite? hehehe.
*dreams about having her own iPod mini*yeah...happy... never been this happy for the past few months. Hmm.... Home is still the best place for me. =) North, south, east, west... home is still DA BEST! You guys gotta agree with me ya... haha. You will never find anything like your home no matter where you are. Trust me, family is still the best people on earth. =) hehehe... so happy to be with my family rite now coz i've been missing them like hell for the past 3 weeks or so. Thank God to be at home again... =)
*can't stop herself from smiling*On a heavier note, AS results gonna come out tomorrow! Yikes ! Yikes ! Yikes ! Anyhow, i'll try to keep myself as calm as possible when i phone my head of programme tomorrow. Gotta be REAL COOL... and yup...wish me luck!!! i need lots of it!
*trying hard not to worry*will blog tomorrow.... depends whether i'm in a good mood or a lousy mood...and tomorrow my mood will solely depends on my AS results....so pray hard that i'll be in a good mood tomorrow ya.... hehe.
*keeping her fingers crossed*Good luck to all those (including me) who are gonna know of their AS results tomorrow! God will help those who help themselves....so dun fret....just leave it in the hands of God... it all depends on our fate... so yeah..once again...ALL DA BEST to all A-level ppl worldwide.
*saying a prayer*
Last day of my 4th semester in A-level.... it's actually the final semester since the next 'semester' will be our revision classes. Yup.
Almost everyone went back to their respective hometowns today. A few of us going back tomorrow... and yeah...i finally have the chance to pack my luggage and books and get my feet off this place. Saturday morning, which is tomorrow morning... =) Was looking forward to this day since a very looooonng time ago. Ahhh.....
*knocks own head to prove that she's not dreaming*yup. it's real. =) i'm going back home tomorrow!!!!
*smiles*Last class was ultimately boring today. It was law. Anybody will expect it to be boring anyway. Half of the class turned up. 2 boys. 3 girls. Super duperly boring. I dunno what other words should i use besides the word 'boring' to describe law classes everytime. So just bear with me... it's the lecturer...not really the subject though. Hopefully i won't be sued by the lecturer for defamation...lol. Even if he sued me, i still got some defences backing me up. =P
Time flies... can't imagine... kinda having mixed feelings since this morning i woke up. I dunno why. I was hoping that time can fly as fast as possible BUT at the same time i was hoping that time can slow down as well... weird huh? Guess i'm just not THAT well-prepared to face reality yet...it's too harsh...it's too cruel.... i need some more time to prepare myself in order to be brave about reality. Growing up is VERY tough indeed...
*wishing to be Peter Pan, the boy who never grows up*Ugh. Fairytales will never happen in reality. Maybe in my dreams, perhaps?
Life would be perfect if i could just adjust the ticking of the 'reality clock' anytime i want... if only i could...
I'm totally freaked out. Yup. i'm just that WEAK. believe it or not.
I'm scared.
*tears starting to drop*I'm worried like hell. It's 3rd of August by the way.
*crying away*I'm pissed off by my attitude.
I hate this part of myself.
Why can't i just change to the better and be less paranoid????? ARGGHHHH...
*punching and kicking herself all over*I guess the saying is very true indeed... "Some people are just too hard to change." or rather...too stubborn.
*slaps her own face*It's tough to live up to other people's expectations. That's all i can say.
Full stop.
*continue crying again*
